stress

<em>Is it a Matter of Biting Off More Than We Can Chew; or A Simple Case of Not Being Focused?</em>

Is it a Matter of Biting Off More Than We Can Chew; or A Simple Case of Not Being Focused?

It’s been 21 days that I have posted an article every day.

I am grateful for the self-imposed challenge, but I find that other things that are important to me have fallen by the wayside.

And herein is my dilemma.

This struggle is nothing new for me: I easily overcommit and run after the shiny things rolling around in the corner.

I want to write, but I want to do X, Y, & Z too.

But…I can’t accomplish everything and still maintain a healthy life balance.

I need to sleep sometime, and I find that is usually the first thing to go when I’ve overextended myself.

Sleep is a precious commodity to staying healthy and living a full and long life.

There’s a plethora of studies that confirm this and an entire division of science dedicated to sleep. It’s not a new concept that if you sacrifice sleep on a regular basis, you will sacrifice your physical and mental health, and shorten your lifespan.

Yet, it is never just one thing.

Sleep tanked, yes…but other areas suffered and were put on hold too. I found myself becoming more and more stressed by not having enough time in the day to complete other tasks: classes I’m taking, web design, working a part-time gig, reading, finishing a novel, and researching for the next article.

Because let’s face it, when you contribute to a site like Medium.com, you need to have well-written and well-researched material.

If you don’t have the time to read and research, your articles are not going to be the best. They’ll be littered with disjointed opinions and ideas that don’t add value to anyone; rather those articles just become another outlet for personal writing like you would find in a journal.

Of course, for some of us that consume such material—myself included—it’s one thing to read someone like James Altucher’s material (he bleeds all over the page about his life, and I love it), versus someone like Zat Rana who writes incredibly well researched and thought-provoking articles on a consistent basis (which I also love).

Well, there’s certainly a contrast between both, but also a common thread…both are well read, and both do a ton of research.

I find that when I’m not focused and am pulled by too many projects and thoughts and nebulous ideas at the same time, I’m frustrated, anxious, and do not produce anything that resembles my best.

This is why multitasking is such a high anxiety producer; you do just enough to check off the next item in the list of whatever that needed your attention right now, and then move onto the next 9-1-1 emergency vying for your mental and physical attention, but is it your best work?

So, for now, I’ll go back to publishing an article on a regular basis, whether it’s weekly, or bi-monthly, I haven’t decided yet.

What I do know is that I want my articles to add value and create a space in someone’s life to give pause and consider what is important and hopefully stir that consideration into a positive next step.

***

Takeaway

Being scattered and overcommitted in our lives creates a tension and anxiety that just doesn’t need to be.

That anxiety can be overwhelming, and our productivity suffers, not to mention relationships, goals and dreams, and our sanity.

The most satisfying and rewarding times in my life have been when I have prioritized what is truly important and then focused my attention on those things.

During those time, even when I’ve failed, being focused and not allowing myself to be pulled in every direction, those failures haven’t registered as a failure, but something to draw my inner strength upon and to figure a way around, under, or through whatever obstacle that got in the way.

And(!) when I’m focused and have my commitments aligned in a unified direction, my life is more at peace.

~ Love


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Posted by Christian Martin Jr. in Intentional Living, Life Hack, Productivity, Purpose, Self, Self-Improvement, stress, Writing
<em>This One Question May Help You Cope with Stress During the Holidays</em>

This One Question May Help You Cope with Stress During the Holidays

Holidays are here.

Not trying to be pessimistic, but so is the associated stress that can come with them.

So I thought I’d share a lil question that has helped me through the years since I first heard it and my rumination over the same. Not to only help me reduce the stress of the holidays but just about every area in life that I’ve stressed over or freaked out about.

Here it is and here we go…

Does it Really Matter?

I don’t know.

I used to think it did.

Of course, I thought everything mattered. Hence, I was always uptight, upset, and unsettled which meant I was unhappy most days.

“Does it really matter,” he said. Mentors always have a way with words at just the right time.

I didn’t know. I thought so.

At the time, something or someone did something that I thought really mattered…and I was ticked.

Of course it mattered! So much so that it clearly made a huge impact on me that I now have forgotten what it was. But I have not forgotten my mentor’s words about what matters.

In 100 years from now, when we’re dead and gone, will it matter? Will it matter tomorrow morning? How about in an hour? Or…in 5 minutes?

I don’t know. Maybe it will. Most don’t.

________________________________________________________________________

There’s only so much energy I possess. Then I have to recharge.

I used to think that it all mattered, but it doesn’t.

I once believed what so-&-so was doing, did, or about to do, mattered to me. But does it really?

Gossip never does.

I suppose if someone is standing next to your house with a lit torch and about to set the thing on fire, yes, I would say that matters.

Yet, I think of all the years I spent frazzled, stressed, and bent about something, or someone, when I finally took an honest look at how short life is, I had to agree with my mentor.

Most of the things, situations, and people we stress over on a daily basis is not worth the energy expended.

Stress shaves layers of our health away.

It creates a tension in our minds that our thoughts feed off of and then we are viewing a picture show in our brains that is totally inaccurate and compounds the wrenching in our guts…usually over things and situations that won’t matter in the morning. Why? Because most of the scenarios we give ourselves to are not based in reality.

Fear and worry are the biggest fictional stories that haunt us.

So, I wonder about what does matter?

______________________________________________________________________

A little over a year ago, after making some huge life changes, I locked myself out of the house, and this is what happened…

  1. I immediately flashed a slight grin and chuckled, “Hmmm…”
  2. I checked every door and window: yep, all locked up. I congratulated myself, “Wow, good job. You really locked this baby up tight.”
  3. Sat down for about an hour and enjoyed the sunshine. Meditated a bit. Read and got some work accomplished on my smart device.
  4. Then the thought hit me…how to get into the house without breaking, damaging, or ruining anything on the home.
  5. I calmly got inside with a little help of some items I always carry.

After I got inside, another thought hit me, Wow, not once at any time during this whole event did I get uptight, upset, or unnerved—there was a day I would’ve destroyed a door or a window, not just to get in, but more out of anger.

And that…has been a process that has been intentional, purposeful, and filled with much self-examination over the past few years.

And that…made me happy…all because of, does it really matter?


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Posted by Christian Martin Jr. in Life Hack, Living Better, Self, Self-Improvement, stress